This evening I went to the store to grab a couple items. When I walked past the card aisle I was moved by the sight of people buying cards for Fathers Day, just a few days away. A card was not on my list, but after I had found the stuff I had come to get I returned to the card aisle.

After reviewing a few cards I found one that was perfect for my father. The design and theme of the card fit him well. And the message expressed exactly how I felt. It was truly the perfect card.

Then I put the card back on the rack. And I walked away, delighted with my find though I didn’t purchase it.

You see, my father passed away 27 years ago. Reading the different cards and finding the perfect one was a small ceremony of remembrance and healing. informal and impromptu yet meaningful.

Fathers Day is a paradox for me. In all the years I have had to reflect on what it is like to lose your father there is one phrase I have found that describes it best. It sucks. And yet woven in tightly there is joy. In life our relationships are part of who we are. And the deep and meaningful relationships continue to be part of us long after the other person is gone. I am grateful to my father for giving me life and for living his life in a way that impacted mine so significantly.

And Fathers Day is also very special to me because I am blessed to be father to three wonderful children who are all amazing young adults and each a great leader in their own way.

If you share with me in the paradox of Fathers Day, I wish you all the best in this time. Take it for what it is, all of it, and let it make something richer of you. The full marvel of life comes not from its glorious moments but from all the bits and pieces of its entirety.

Happy Fathers Day.